Friends - Nathaniel Cole
Workshop Facilitator and researcher specialising in Masculinity, Relationships & Sex Education (RSE) and Mental Wellbeing. Co-Founder of Swim Dem Crew, London
We first met as part of the RDC Youngers. He was one of the group we coached and mentored within the Run Dem Crew Youngers programme, supporting them to complete a 10K and mentoring them on careers and industry. Nathaniel stood out as being calm, measured, genuine, and someone who wanted to do well and support others. He has taken his passion to support many initiatives and stayed as part of the RDC, later starting Swim Dem, again giving back to the community and passing the baton on.
One of the good guys!
How would you describe yourself, and what drives you?
I’m a people person who makes change, whether that’s in someone's mind so they start to believe in themselves or at a swimming pool, so that a truer representation of London can enjoy water. I want to know that I can do hard things, that’s what drives me.
What pivotal moments have shaped your journey so far?
I started ‘getting fit ’ 14 years ago and was documenting the process of discovering running and rediscovering swimming through tumblr. A certain Candice Brathwaite was also on there. She told me about a youth project organised by Run Dem Crew. I applied, got in, and it changed my life. I’ve since gone on to run more half marathons worth counting and 10 marathons.
Being in Run Dem inspired myself, Emily and Peigh to create our own community in the water, Swim Dem Crew. We’ve taught 100s of people how to swim and changed our fair amount of lives using water, too.
With regards to my facilitation work, that started in 2016 after I attended an event on Masculinity at SOAS (typical). An organisation delivering a session there said they needed volunteers. That work took me all over the country to talk to young men and boys about what they thought being a man actually is. It’s both challenging and rewarding, which led me to focus on consent. In 2019 I was asked by TEDxLondon to speak about how to engage young men in these discussions properly and continue to do so to this day.
What is your relationship with Rosie Lee, Unorthodox Blend, and/or Mark & Russell?
I had the pleasure of being mentored by Mark in 2011 for the RDC Younger project. Midway through the project, I shared with him that I was intimidated by all the ‘accomplished’ people at Run Dem and wanted to improve my employability prospects, even add more strings to my bow. Mark said, “Firstly, don't be intimidated, pressured or impressed by titles that people shout out”. I’m proud to say that I took on that advice and still follow it.
What has come out of any relationship and collaborations?
What I’ve found most rewarding about the relationship is that it provided a window into adulthood that was separate from family and allowed me to settle into my imperfections. All while having fun travelling the world, running shoes and a bright mind in tow.
What does being unorthodox mean to you in your work?
It means embracing a DIY way of working that might be required to get the most out of people or a situation.
What beliefs have guided you through tough decisions?
Life is bigger than me. I know that my decisions will ripple far beyond what I say or do in a moment.
What challenge in your field of work is often overlooked?
There is a reason that London hasn’t exploded with swimming crews. It’s hard work making swimming accessible and fun, but I wouldn’t trade it for anything else. What’s challenging about working with teenagers? The clue is in the name! Teenagers can be standoffish, quiet and full of bravado, all at the same time. It’s my job to get them to drop the mask and tell me what they think. I do that through creative games and being authentic with them.
How do you balance creativity with structure/order with chaos?
I used to struggle with the idea of balance. My friend said that we pursue balance, rather than being balanced. Freelancing can feel like spinning plates a lot of the time. I now put less pressure on myself to spin all the plates. Now it’s about tackling tasks, one plate at a time, to alleviate my anxious mind.
What cultural shifts are you noticing in your field of work?
It’s in communication.
Snapchat & TikTok have had a huge impact on how young people speak to each other, it feels like a lost art form now.
With my masculinity and RSE work, we’ve also been swimming against a huge current of misogyny that’s been amplified in the last few years. It’s tiring, but I won’t stop being present so that young men and boys have a balanced reference of masculinity.
In swimming, we’ve seen the landscape change for the better; it’s more inclusive to an extent, but we’ll have to see how it goes. 2025 is being slated as the death of the body positivity movement, which will only be true if brands that inserted themselves into that ideology did so under weak foundations.
Unorthodox
If you could master any skill instantly, what would it be?
Learning a language. Duolingo and that pesky owl only took my French so far.
What’s one experience everyone should have at least once?
Watching a friend run/walk/crawl the London Marathon. You’ll get why I said it once you do it.
What has inspired you lately? ( book, podcast, music, news, articles)
I’m inspired by matchmaker and life coach, Paul C Brunsons. His podcast, ‘We Need To Talk’, is where he sits down with both celebs and professionals to talk about their life and expertise. I want to move into the field of therapy one day, so his conversation with psychologist Dr Julie Smith shed a light on the process and career thoughts of someone in that career.
He has also had Jordan Stephens on. It’s a great conversation about addiction, self-discovery, recovery and most importantly, growth, big up Jordan.
I read ‘The Will To Change’ by bell hooks last year. It affirmed my life experience and how I have looked at the world and masculinity. I highly recommend it.
Musically, you have to check out Everything is Recorded. The brainchild of Richard Russell and his extremely long black book of collaborators, including Sampha, Syd, Berwyn, & Alabaster Deplume. All coming together to make timeless music. I went to a talk where he discussed creating the latest album ‘Temporary’ which was fascinating. I could listen to him all day, he’s definitely lived a full life.
What advice would you give to young people starting out in their career?
Seek clarity. Ask questions, put yourself in front of opportunities.
How can people connect with you, get involved or take part in any of the projects you’ve highlighted above?
Email me via my website - https://nathanielcole.co.uk/
Bonus Question
What question would you like us to ask the next person?
You wake up in an alternate universe where you are given the superpower that allows you to time travel and relive your life from the past, once. When do you go and why?
Totally up to you which contact details you share. Feel free to add to those below.
Find me on Instagram - https://www.instagram.com/nathanielacole/
Swim Dem - https://www.instagram.com/swimdemcrew/
Substack - https://substack.com/@nathanielacole
LinkedIn - https://www.linkedin.com/in/nathaniel-cole-74125672/
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